Not the Way to Color the World

It seems that for every awesome thing Deion does, he follows up with an equally foolish thing. I guess that's the prerequisite for adolescence. We were having our usual talk over dinner when Deion chewed hard, tucked his chin into his chest and swallowed. That's usually our high sign that something unfavorable is on the crest of the tongue.

It went like this:"Um, on Friday when I was at the bus stop, somebody took my book bag and turned it upside down and all of my crayons fell out and broke into pieces on the ground. So I picked them back up and put them in my bag. When I got on the bus I started throwing the pieces out of the window and I actually hit a car. Mr. Carlson (the assistant principal) was going to give me a letter to bring home but he didn't."

So I asked him out of curiosity how many pieces of crayon he tossed. And honestly, I was thinking 20 maybe. He said he didn't know, but when he counted the remaining pieces in his bag, it was more like 43!

I suppressed my laughter as did my wife. I couldn't say a word. It was the most shocking moment twisted with humor. How he decided that it was all right to pitch crayons out of the window baffles me. Deion, the one who calls out anyone who litters, now amongst the litterbugs.

So we discussed the incident and decided to show him how the courts would have handled it -- since we're teaching the boys about real world consequences in our home -- and tailored his punishment around the statues in the Code of Virginia. We treated the littering as a misdemeanor (punishable by up to 12 months in jail and a $2,500 fine or community service hours) and the striking of the car as a class 4 felony (punishable by up to 5 years in jail and a $25,000 fine in the event that someone is killed, which could have really happened). We told him that he would be given a "sentence" of 21.5 hours of community service (30 minutes per crayon piece flung) and 5 weeks to do it in, plus a $25 fine in which he must purchase school supplies for the kids at the Boys and Girls Club. Should he fail to complete his hours, he would be required to live with five weeks of restriction that are currently suspended pending his completion of community service.

Real world. Somewhat.

But my boys need to deal with the results of their choices as they grow up. This world does not care about them and if they don't use their heads, the system will devour them. So I have no gripes about laying this one on thick because it's better me that the Spotsylvania County Sheriff's Department and the Juvenile Court System.

Quincy Update

This week, Quincy is picking his head up, rolling himself over and he's on the verge of actual laughter. He get so tickled sometimes that he expresses laughter, but nothing comes out. He's also holding things, like his pacifier and a small rattle.

Sing A Song Update

So last week I told you about trying to get Deion to sing to Quincy and how he wouldn't. His whole attitude changed this week. On the way home Sunday, he started to sing songs to Quincy when he cried. No one had to ask him, he just started belting out Reliant K songs in hopes of calming his little brother. It didn't work as it seems he only like to hear his mommy singing "Awesome God" in endless loop, but I was stoked that he took the initiative and that he responded to the challenge I gave him last week about giving his all when serving others.

Chris

Working Father

So I’m up like 19 hours a day. It’s usually like this during the fall when little league football season rolls around. We publish a sports newspaper for the young athletes called TeamKids (www.treehouse-publishing.com/teamkids.html). It’s an idea my uncle and I came up with years ago and implemented in 2004. We take their pictures, drop in summaries from their games, etc. It’s a big hit because most of those little guys may never see the big newspaper, but they see their names and faces in print in our paper every week. But it’s physically and mentally taxing. It usually means that I spend more time in my office working at night, since I have a full time day job, too. And this takes away from time to be with the family in the evenings. We try to make the most of it by having breakfast together in the morning and have a devotional, by also having some quality talk time during dinner, and by playing a game or watching a movie together on Friday nights. I long for extra time with my boys during this time, but I know that by providing for them, I’m doing a good thing, too, because for me not to work as hard as I do would mean that they wouldn’t have their mom home all day long. And that alone for me is worth the sleepless nights.

Quincy Update

Baby Quincy is now a cool 3 months old. He’s holding his little head up, able to sleep on his tummy and loves to be amused. He has the greatest smile. His face lights up with delight whenever someone brusher a few fingers against his cheeks. He’s cooing a lot now, too. Says something that sounds like “Hi!” So we all go up to him and say “Hi!” and because he recognizes the sound and the pitch, he says it back most of the time. It’s quite cute.

He’s growing considerably, too. It’s tough for me to football hold him anymore. He’s outgrown the length of my forearm and he squirms like a little fish. His eyes seem to be settling in to their natural color, too. They were a copper color for a long time, but now they look like mocha.

Sing a Song

My wife has trained Quincy to enjoy the sound of music to soothe him. Whenever he cries she plays music or sings to him and it calms him down. So on the way to church on Sunday, he broke into his own tear-filled song. Lisa asked Deion four times to sing to Quincy. Evidently he was embarrassed to sing -- though he whales some awful notes to himself in his room at night. So finally, I asked him to forget it, challenged him on his deliberate disobedience and took away his video games for the day and gave him an early bed time and asked Jordan to do it. Jordan sang song after song to Quincy. Didn’t calm him down fully, but it helped. It was about effort and Deion gave excuses. He may not have been able to calm Quincy either, but he didn’t try.

When we got to church, I had a talk with Deion about giving his whole heart in all matters. After all, it was his baby brother who needed his help. He apologized and admitted he wasn’t really doing his best. I accepted his apology, but I’ll see if it’s genuine the next time he’s asked to sing.
Chris

Do Nothing. Want Everything.

In the fall, our family publishes an independent newspaper for youth football teams in Fauquier County. So one of the things we must do is sell the paper. We usually offer the boys cash for walking around the football fields and selling the newspaper and Jordan collects money for interviewing players and snapping pictures of them.

This year we offered incentives or cash and they both jumped at the incentives. So when they hit a certain number of sales, they get a reward. We even let them determine what the prizes would be. So our list included gift certificates, sports jerseys, video games, an iPod Nano, a Sony PSP and a $250 shopping spree.

We’re in week two already and neither has come close to the first level incentive (100 sales). The first week, Deion dragged his body around the field and sold a measly 12 papers. I told him that his job is now up for grabs and I’m going to pursue some motivated kids to compete with him and that would mean his opportunity to average 100 sales a week like last year could be in jeopardy.

One week later…

Deion is sitting in the car reading comic books and Jordan is walking around with his football buddy. I have two girls blazing the sidelines, selling papers and building incentive credit. My boys, who ask me for everything, fail to see that I give them the opportunity to have it. It’s not wrapped in a bow as they would want it, but as Thomas Edison said, “It’s dressed in overalls and looks like work.”

But that’s not it. We also write video game reviews for the paper, too. So when I stopped by Blockbuster on Sunday afternoon, Deion says, “Can we rent a game!” I said “Sure. I’m going to rent a game to review. If you play it and write about it for me, I’ll rent you a game too.”

Never mind.

I saw that coming, too.

Chris